DON’T LOOK BACK, JUST LOOK FORWARD

It’s been five years since everything changed. I told myself I wouldn’t look back but sometimes my mind couldn’t help but to. I suppose everything happens for a reason, but I just couldn’t put my finger on what the reasoning was to why everything happened the way it did. Nonetheless, there was no point dwelling in the past, I had to look forward now. Looking back wouldn't serve me any good, is what I would’ve liked to believe, but I still had this giant weight on my chest that just wouldn’t budge no matter how much I tried to ignore it. Although I had almost lost the will to do much of anything, I still wanted this weight off of my chest and this weight is what compelled me to seek out the monk that lived in a temple near the mountains who was said to have mastered the art of inner peace. When I arrived, the first thing I noticed was the scenery, it was something straight out of a movie. Beautiful rose petals, a waterfall as big as a mountain, birds singing and more. I called out to see if anyone was home, but no one answered, so I took it upon myself to walk through the temple until I eventually came across an old shrine.

“This shrine is where I come to pray,” said the Monk.

“Sorry, I didn't mean to intrude but I came here to ask for a favor. Will you take me on as your apprentice, sir? I’m stuck in a loop, and I don’t know how to move forward on my own. I figured you could teach me how to do it,” said Alex.

He accepts my request and I begin studying under his guidance. The first thing he made me do was train my mind and body.

“A strong mind will equal a strong body and vice versa. By mentally preparing yourself for the worst, you ultimately tell your body that you can do just about anything and that is what builds confidence,” said the Monk.

Over the course of six months, he trained me, but I didn’t see any progress.

“Master, it’s been six months and I still don’t feel any different,”

“The process takes time; it’s not just going to happen overnight.”

“Yeah, I know..”

“If you know, then why ask?”

“It’s just that.. What if I’m not up for this?, what if I fail?

“Oh Alex, you focus too much on what ifs. Try focusing more on what is.

“I understand”

“You are too concerned of what was, so much so that you rob yourself of what could be because you’re afraid, you’ll fail again. If you don’t remember any of my teachings, then I want you to at least remember this. Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery but today is a gift. That is why it’s called the present.”

“What does any of that mean?”

“You will understand soon enough.”

A year had passed, and the training was over; it was now time to leave the temple.

“Alex, before you leave, I’d like to know what you learned or rather, what you gained from this experience?”

“Well, let’s see..”

I thought long and hard about it for a moment and then I thought about what he said to me that day near the cherry blossom tree. That’s when it hit me. I couldn’t believe it took me so long to figure out what the monk was talking about but nonetheless, I did.

“Ah, I got it!”

“Well, go on then.”

“You will never move forward if you keep holding on to what is already gone. Losing something or someone changes you, it breaks pieces of you that you thought would last forever. You spend nights wishing you could go back and redo everything, but the truth is, loss isn’t the end of your story; it’s the beginning of a new chapter. You can’t rebuild if you’re still standing in the ashes. You can’t heal if you keep reopening the same wound just to see if it still hurts. The moment you accept that some things are meant to end is the moment you start to grow again, because loss doesn’t stop your life, it reshapes it. As you learn and adapt each day, you become stronger than the person you were yesterday. You never forget what you lost, but you learn to build something beautiful out of what is left.”

“Well done, Alex. I have nothing left to teach you.

After he said that, I felt it. for the first time in years, I felt the weight on my chest finally lift itself. Since then, I’ve rebuilt my life and I’m here to tell you to not look back at your past because your past doesn’t serve you anymore; what you do in the present day does. It’s okay to stop and smell the roses occasionally, and it’s even okay to think about looking back sometimes but when you do, remember, to just look forward.